26 August → 11 October 2026. Start to finish, bosses to corpse runs, and every corpse run in between.
A montage, assembled from the logs themselves: the death-log mod, the Discord transcripts, the server journal, the bot's own database, and the bot's own mouth. Times are server-local (Sydney, +10 until 4 Oct, +11 after) unless marked UTC. Nothing here is invented — where the record is empty, this document says so out loud.
ROOKIE — the Chief, known to the bot as Rock Steele, Discord ranjiko, Steam 76561198031879215.
56 sessions · 55h 01m · 1,112 kills · 72 deaths · longest run 4h 53m.
Answers to "Chief", "Rock Steele", and "@everyone". Dies at a rate that suggests he is playing a different, harder game than everybody else.
VOJ — Discord voj, Steam 76561198032796801. The one who asked.
62 sessions · 49h 54m · 1,791 kills · 22 deaths · longest run 3h 34m.
Owns the boat. Has strong opinions about boats. Ramming a boat into the coast with a single chest on it is, per Voj, a technique.
LANA — Discord brave_piglet_91452, Steam 76561198049490421. The bot calls her "the idol".
39 sessions · 47h 50m · 1,976 kills · 22 deaths · longest run 3h 13m.
Four boss kills. All of them. Every single one.
CONAN THE THIRD — Discord lep4421, Steam 76561198044518548. Author of the Viking Code of Conduct.
80 sessions · 87h 29m · 184 kills · 0 deaths · longest run 3h 22m.
Undefeated, un-killed, and — as the record will show — un-modded.
DAMO — Discord bman_042 (also "Boogerman"), Steam 76561197990670966.
50 sessions · 92h 38m · 4,032 kills · 82 deaths · longest single run 7h 18m.
The stats say Damo is better at Valheim than everyone else here combined. He also has the most deaths. Both things are true.